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insane in the membrane...

2003-03-14 - 4:32 p.m.

"Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose..." and also a snarky synonym for "French." Someday I hope to have a house with Freedom doors opening onto the patio. I shall Freedom kiss my husband before serving him salad with Freedom dressing and Freedom toast. I shall wear my hair up in a Freedom twist, or perhaps in a Freedom braid, and my nails will sport an impeccable Freedom manicure. For dessert we'll dine on Freedom vanilla ice cream, possibly while watching a remake of The Freedom Connection.

Sorry. I just find it incredibly ironic that to punish the French, we are doing such a typically French thing. I mean, changing the names of stuff? Come on.

In other news, our government no longer wants to provide pre-natal care to welfare mothers. Nor does it want to provide emergency contraception to rape victims in hospitals. Because after all, kiddies, life begins at fertilization!!

Now regardless of which side of the abortion debate you come down on, I think the vast majority of scientists would agree that the earliest you can conceivably claim life begins is at implantation, NOT fertilization. Cause I got news for these senators--if they're so deeply concerned about fertilized eggs being cruelly prevented from implanting in a woman's womb, then they'd better start confiscating used pads and tampons.

But wait, I forget myself. After all, the rape victim was probably asking for it.

I seriously think our government has gone insane. What else do you call it when they follow a man who knows war is the right thing to do because he talks to God?

 

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