Weekend Update

2005-06-13 - 4:54 p.m.

I'm constantly writing these magnificent, witty and eloquent essays/posts in my head, and never bothering to get them out into the computer and on this site. So what you're left with are my hideous metaphorical brain-droppings, or, as in this case, a recitation of my weekend, a la "What I Did for Summer Vacation"--grown-up style!

WHAT I DID OVER THE WEEKEND

CHORES!

Actually, some genuine fun was had. Friday night R. decided to open up the nice rose we got, and we called up our neighbors. They dutifully sat their two girls down in front of a movie, we came over, and proceeded to drink and play Trivial Pursuit until the cows came home! The thing about Trivial Pursuit, the original edition, is that all the questions are from 1981. Some of them are, shall we say, dated. Now Prince R, as you all know, is a PhD candidate in history. I'm an editor. Neighbor K is a lawyer, and neighbor Y is a medical librarian. We're not slack-jawed yokels, but many of these questions were so obscure it would make your head spin around and then you commence with the vomiting with the pea soup. One question made reference to a classic rags-to-riches Oscar-winner. The answer: Rocky. As K said, �I thought Rocky was more of a rags-to-rags story and not so much with the riches.� I�d cite a more egregious example of dated questions, but the memories, they are gone from my head already. Regardless-we played boys against girls, and it was the first time I had ever lost at Trivial Pursuit. But they were clearly getting easier questions. Clearly.

Next morning, I woke up early and went off to my running session. I hadn�t been running in a couple weeks, so I thought I�d die, but I did surprising well. That is, after running a mile in the blazing hot sun, limping along and thinking of inventive ways to die. But after that, I got onto the trails and into the shade, and life was much better. For those of you playing the home game, I�m back up to running 34 minutes nonstop. When I reached my time, I was actually disappointed�I felt I could have gone on for quite a bit longer. Earlier we�d learned about the importance of Kegels, and I must proselytize: Ladies! Do your Kegels! Cause one day you�ll be pregnant or sick or running, and the leakage, it will happen. But not if you do your Kegels faithfully.

After getting back, I dragged poor Prince R back into the house, as he had been busy weed-wacking the front lawn and was about to keel over from heat exhaustion. We jumped in the car, got some lunch, and headed off to Costco to buy a fan. The preceding conversation had gone something like this: R: We don�t have money to buy a fan right now. It will be a hundred dollars. W: If we don�t buy a fan I will rip out your entrails and use them to cool my fevered brow. R: Any affordable fan will be crappy. W: I will slit your throat and then bathe in your blood if we don�t get a fan. Also, we�ll save money by not turning up the air conditioning all the way. Reason and the threats of violence prevailed, and we are now the proud owners of a big fan and a tiny bonus fan. And lo, the air conditioning is now maintained at a reasonable level, and the fan, she bloweth sweet cool air upon us and the cat.

Sunday I prepared puerco pibil and peach trifle, and we had K and Y and their delightful daughters over again. We also cleaned like bitches. The downstairs of our house is almost perfect now. The upstairs? Not so much. We still have the perpetual freaking pile of laundry, which never seems to shrink no matter how much laundry we actually do. We have the perpetual and frightening amount of paperwork to be scanned, and we still have books everywhere. But we�re having a stream of visitors starting in July, of which faithful readers L and M comprise two, and I have perfect faith we should be able to get the house completely under control.

I�m really looking forward to all our guests. We�re having our best man out for a few days in July, L and M out in August, my parents, brother, sister-in-law and niece out in October, another sister-in-law out for Thanksgiving, and possibly yet another sister-in-law for Christmas. The house, she runneth over with sisters-in-law. We�re working on getting a sofa bed for the guests, and this poses a dilemma for me. Do I get a really nice sofa bed, or do I Craigslist this sucker? Because if The Plan works, the guest room will start to convert to a nursery in 18-24 months, and I don�t really want to spend $500 on something we�ll have in the house less than two years. Or do I get the sofa-bed that matches our current living room furniture, and then when we have a kid and start doing the nursery, put the couch in storage and keep the sofa-bed for visiting grandparents and other guests? It�s a dilemma. Regardless, I�m looking forward to welcoming our family into our house, and am already dreaming about decorating the house for the holidays and my Thanksgiving menu and scented soaps for my guests and other such domestic touches. I am a Domestic Goddess!

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