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thoughts and complaints

2003-07-11 - 1:09 p.m.

Kayaking tomorrow--and so tonight finds me at Hudson Trail Outfitters, outfitting myself and the husband. I'd particularly like to outfit myself with a PFD (or lifejacket, as you humans call them), but I think we should wait to make sure this is something we'll be doing on a regular basis. I highly anticipate that it will be, but I have been known to be wrong on various occasions throughout my life.

Saw "Pirates of the Carribean" last night--I highly reccomend. It was like movie popcorn--salty but with a hint of sweet, and ultimately satisfying. It would not have been nearly so good without Johnny Depp, who made the film with his pirate portrayal. Someone please tell me why we had to wait this long to see him play a pirate.

We arrived at the theater ten or so minutes ahead of the showtime, only to be informed that we had missed a substantial portion of The Twenty (our pre-show entertainment) and that next time we should make every effort to show up early. I asked the husband why I would want to show up 20 minutes early to a movie to be treated to thinly veiled commercial pap. He had no answer. I have come to most deeply resent paying $8 to be shown commercials before my movie. Not least commercials for apparently stupid movies with Tom Cruise as "The Last Samurai." I think we can all bet our rearmost anatomy that the last Samurai will not be some short, skinny white-boy SCIENTOLOGIST! If you will be so kind as to pardon my French, come the fuck on!

I believe the husband has a yearning to see "28 days later." Far from being an in-depth examination of PMS and the menstrual cycle, this looks like a cheap rip-off of "Night of the Living Dead." I tell him this scornfully, but the deep-down dirty truth is that I am too scared to go see it. Those glowing red eyes freak me out. I myself have been overheard to have a yearning for "Finding Nemo," as I have a thing for sharks with Australian accents. Also high on my list is the upcoming "Hidalgo" about a horse race across the Arabian desert, starring Viggo Mortenson (who is perhaps better known as the whiny "I lack the proper self-confidence to be king even though that's not at all how Tolkien wrote me" Aragorn in the LOTR movies).

In other news, over a few drinks, my friend B the makeup whore announced her decision to vote for Satan if he were to provide universal hair care for Americans. Satan, if you are out there, you know what your platform should be. B also confided that if Satan were to include a universal makeup allowance, she might just run his campaign. To this I must say: you go, girl.

I leave you with this thought: Which is better, to be just or to be good? Discuss amongst yourselves.


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